dream | act | succeed

I have been doing my daily mediation practice for the last 2 months. The result is quite obvious. I feel better doing it. But I haven’t made any progress getting more in control. Quite the opposite actually. I notice the thoughts, the worries, the problems way sooner which is a good thing, don’t get me wrong on that. But it’s also showing me how weak I am, at least mentally. It shows me clearly that I don’t know who is in control, but it’s not me. I am just all over the place. My sleep hasn’t improved. My worries haven’t decreased. It’s all like it is before.

I know what I am doing wrong. I am distracting myself too much! But what should I do? How should I do it? How can I fight against it? I guess the answer lies within my worries. I am the problem. I react to those thoughts. I let those thoughts bother me.

See you next time!