#4 Goals setting – a beginners guide

Observing the people around me I realized in shock, that most of them do not actually follow goals in their life’s. Or at least, not anymore. They just “life” by instinct. Born into a certain type of environment they just absorbed the behaviors of their peers, their family or their neighbors and now, they just imitate it. Over and over, day by day. Welcome to the society of envy, fear and gossip.

“Do not, under any circumstances do something they will not accept! It is too dangerous for your reputation. You do not want to be the weirdo in this community!”

And this is exactly the problem I see in the community I life in.

“Telling my neighbors that I will become a race car driver? Did you loose your mind!!! What would they think? They would laugh at me! They would tell everyone else! That would be the end!”

Oh really! Would that be the end? Would that stop you from doing what you want to do?

In my case, this was holding me back for a long long time. This was knocking me off my feet! Every fucking time! They were keeping me small. Word by word, laugh by laugh, glance by glance. The ex-girlfriend that talked me down, the teacher that always stated out my mistakes in front of the class, all those things, little by little, created a kind of mindset I had and still have sometimes, in which I am so afraid of the reaction of others, that I do not follow my dreams. I do not give 100 % of what I have, because I am AFRAID.

But why are you talking about this? Is not the goal setting guide on todays menu?

Thank you for reminding me! Indeed, on today’s menu we have a delicious goal setting guide. It is the perfect food for your brain on a sunny summer day like today. Lets go!

1. Who do I want to be?

If you have not read my second post about starting, I highly recommend you to start with this one, because it will build the basis for the following steps.

https://dreamactsucceed.blog/2019/06/30/2-the-importance-of-starting/

2. Big five vs. world star

Becoming the Michael Jordan of your field of interest or just scratching the top five percent? This is the decision I can not and will not answer for you. For me, it is definitely not the world star career, because I do not want to focus all my energy just on one particular thing. I want diversification in my life. But for you, this one particular dream you always had, this could mean the world for you, so please, go ahead and reach for the stars.

3. Aim high, start low

Not a single person on this planet ever started his or her triathlon career with the ironman on Hawaii, so why should you try to do this? It is not possible man! You can not start with the most famous race in the triathlon scene without having ever actually trained for it. Therefor I want you to aim high, but start low. You want to go to Kona? No problem! But please do not buy your tickets yet, because actually, there is a lot of other stuff you need to figure out before this.

4. Write down your goals!

Now comes the tricky part! Write down your goals. One after the other. You have more than five? We do not care! Just write them down. You do not need a structure! Just make a shopping list, or a pyramid, or a mind map, or whatever you prefer. Write it down on single cards, on the wall, be creative!

Really? You do not have more than this? Come on! You cannot be serious!

5. Dream bigger than you have ever dreamed before!

Now grab your goals, look at the first one and close your eyes. Imagine the moment you will have done it. Can you feel it? This is your moment! How you are going there is not the task right now, you focus your mind just on the fulfillment. Is that really it? Is that what you want? Or do you want more? Is there even another goal, a bigger one? What is the next level? There is always a next level! Where do you want to go? How high? How wide? And WHY? What is your motivation? Why do you want to do this? Is it really you who wants to achieve this? Or is it someone else? You parents? Your loved ones? Your society? Your environment?

The aim of this exercise is to find out what you really want! Because following a goal that is not actually your goal is like doing homework, you know it needs to be done, but you can imagine at least one thousand better things to do!

6. Adapt your goals

You do not need to chisel your goals into stone! No one expects that from you! Doing a mistake just makes you human. Changing goals? Of course! No big deal! You thought it would be cool, but actually, no, it is not! Just no! This is not my thing! And this is totally fine! If you felt like going for it, but realized it is not for you! Then find something else! Because in the exact moment you have found “YOUR GOALS”, you will feel it! It is like the magic wands from Harry Potter. The wizard is not picking his wand, the wand is picking his wizard. So please believe me, you really need to swing around your goal before you will feel, if it is really the thing you want to reach!

Chose your goal!

7. Be carefull what you wish for

Speaking about magic, we all heard about the dark side. And again, this is kind of the truth. In real life, you obviously do not need to be afraid about dying from a death spell, but sometimes, people chose goals and realize way too far down the road, that actually, they are poisoning them self. Little by little, or sometimes even with heavy dark spells that kills off their free time, their private life’s or even everything they got. So, please keep in mind! You do not need to make a pack with the devil and suffer in hell for the things you want to reach! You are not allowed to do magic outside of Hogwarts! But you are allowed to change your goals if you really need to!

8. Write down what you really want!

This is your last step for today! And it is really that simple. Just write down the goals that did survived! Because these could be your goals! You will feel it!

Final words

Of course, that is not it. That is not the whole process! This is just the start! This is intended to be a guideline for beginners. It suggests a way you can chose to walk by, but it will not lead you to the end. It is giving you more like a kind of orientation. It is like giving you a map in Chinese! You can see the streets, but you can not really figure out neither where you are, nor where you need to go. You just realize that you are in the area. So, that is the step for today. Being in the area of your future!

See you next time!

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